Friday, November 28, 2008

December EGG Speakers - DON'T MISS THEM!




We have a terrific lineup for December.

December 5th, join us for Eli Davidson, the author of Funky to Fabulous. Check out her video interview on the importance of Vitamin G (girlfriends). She will be talking about a provocative subject that you won't want to miss.

December 12th, we will have Andrea Waltz, the author of Go for No. Andrea has a coaching practice called Courage Crafters.

December 19th please don't miss Nancy Widmann, the former CEO of CBS Radio and the author of "I didn't see it coming". In this time when many of you are dealing with career uncertainty for your staff and perhaps even for yourselves, please make sure you join us on the Friday before Christmas.


Don't forget that there will be no EGG call today in recognition of the Thanksgiving holiday

Monday, November 24, 2008

Notes on Smart Networking


Thanks to Flo Lugli, who hosted the call on Friday while I was winging my way back from PhoCusWright.

Our special speaker was Liz Lynch, author of Smart Networking.

Here are the highlights from the call:

  • We are increasingly living in an information driven society, we can use networks to be filters for us so we don’t need to know everything.
  • Only constant is change—if we want to make changes in our jobs, networking can provide support for us. It is like an insurance policy for our career.
  • We need to create a plan to network—start with a purpose and approach strategically. What do I want to accomplish, Who can help me and where/how do I connect with them.
  • Some thoughts to connect---What do you do?, What brings you to the conference?
  • Some thoughts to disengage from a conversation---I enjoyed talking to you, I enjoyed meeting you, before I go can I have your card.
  • Don’t hesitate to ask someone if they know someone you want to meet and if they will introduce you, or offer to introduce them to someone that might help them.
  • Networking today vs yesterday---5-10 years ago networking was limited to face to face and while still very important, online sites now make connecting with people we’ve never met much easier. These are great tools to be used but still need to understand the fundamentals of building relationships (win/win, trust, etc.)
  • The challenge with online networking is deciding where to spend your time and keep from becoming addicted to it.
  • Question—how do you make the decision on whether to respond to an online request to connect? Depends upon your philosophy of how to use the sites. Linkedin for one reason, Facebook for another. Connecting with people you may not know allows you to be in the flow of information and can be a resource pool for you. If you want to ensure your request for connection is accepted, don’t use the default message, state why you want to connect.
  • Definition of networking—process of building and maintaining genuine supportive relationships with people who you are willing to help and whom are willing to help you
  • Smart Networking—way to build relationships—how to begin, how to build and how to do it without a lot of time. Goal is to make it easier and less time consuming
  • Need to master the “art of the ask”—choose who to ask and what/how to ask. Make request appropriate for the level of the relationship you have with the person. Ask for something easy, ask for advice on how to solve something and let them offer ways they can help.
  • One thing to better networking—put plan together, what am I trying to accomplish, who can help, how to engage with them.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

UCLA Study On Friendship Among Women

Chris Bradshaw shared this with me. I am going to see if I can get one of the researchers to be a vignette speaker. I'll let you know!

UCLA Study On Friendship Among Women
An alternative to fight or flight

©2002 Gale Berkowitz

A landmark UCLA study suggests friendships between women are special. They shape who we are and who we are yet to be. They soothe our tumultuous inner world, fill the emotional gaps in our marriage, and help us remember who we really are.

By the way, they may do even more.

Scientists now suspect that hanging out with our friends can actually counteract the kind of stomach-quivering stress most of us experience on a daily basis.

A landmark UCLA study suggests that women respond to stress with a cascade of brain chemicals that cause us to make and maintain friendships with other women. It's a stunning find that has turned five decades of stress research---most of it on men---upside down. Until this study was published, scientists generally believed that when people experience stress, they trigger a hormonal cascade that revs the body to either stand and fight or flee as fast as possible, explains Laura Cousin Klein, Ph.D., now an Assistant Professor of Biobehavioral Health at Penn State University and one of the study's authors. It's an ancient survival mechanism left over from the time we were chased across the planet by saber-toothed tigers.

Now the researchers suspect that women have a larger behavioral repertoire than just fight or flight; In fact, says Dr. Klein, it seems that when the hormone oxytocin is release as part of the stress responses in a woman, it buffers the fight or flight response and encourages her to tend children and gather with other women instead. When she actually engages in this tending or befriending, studies suggest that more oxytocin is released, which further counters stress and produces a calming effect. This calming response does not occur in men, says Dr. Klein, because testosterone---which men produce in high levels when they're under stress---seems to reduce the effects of oxytocin. Estrogen, she adds, seems to enhance it.

The discovery that women respond to stress differently than men was made in a classic "aha" moment shared by two women scientists who were talking one day in a lab at UCLA. There was this joke that when the women who worked in the lab were stressed, they came in, cleaned the lab, had coffee, and bonded, says Dr. Klein. When the men were stressed, they holed up somewhere on their own. I commented one day to fellow researcher Shelley Taylor that nearly 90% of the stress research is on males. I showed her the data from my lab, and the two of us knew instantly that we were onto something.

The women cleared their schedules and started meeting with one scientist after another from various research specialties. Very quickly, Drs. Klein and Taylor discovered that by not including women in stress research, scientists had made a huge mistake: The fact that women respond to stress differently than men has significant implications for our health.

It may take some time for new studies to reveal all the ways that oxytocin encourages us to care for children and hang out with other women, but the "tend and befriend" notion developed by Drs. Klein and Taylor may explain why women consistently outlive men. Study after study has found that social ties reduce our risk of disease by lowering blood pressure, heart rate, and cholesterol. There's no doubt, says Dr. Klein, that friends are helping us live longer.
In one study, for example, researchers found that people who had no friends increased their risk of death over a 6-month period. In another study, those who had the most friends over a 9-year period cut their risk of death by more than 60%.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

LA Event - A good time was had by all!

Thank you SO much to the 36 women (!!!!) who came to the EGG get together tonight. It was so great. I have so enjoyed getting all of you together to get to know one another better. The calls are great, but there is NO substitute for a hug and sharing a glass or two of wine.

We did some great brainstorming about our winter retreat and the consensus is finding a very large villa and a chef to cook for us! All in say aye!

Stay tuned.

Chicke

Sunday, November 16, 2008

EGG Get together in LA at PhoCusWright

For those attending PhoCusWright, please let us know if you will be able to attend our Executive Girlfriend's Group wine hour from 5-630pm (ok.... wine hour and a half!) on Tuesday November 18th in the Solutionz suite at the Renaissance Hotel.

I don't have the number yet, so please make sure to RSVP to me at chicke@solutionz.com so I can put you on the list to call.

Friday, November 7, 2008

How to countermand the Top 10 Time Thieves

We had some very practical advice on today's call from Nicole in her talk on the Top 10 Time Thieves.
  1. Set goals - not only professionally but personally
  2. Schedule specific time for specific tasks, instead of being at the mercy of others for how you spend your time.
  3. Write things down - memorializing what needs to be done gives it "voice" and a much better chance of getting it completed.
  4. Don't respond as if everything is an emergency - this conditions others to expect (and later demand) immediate response from you
  5. Delegate - and if you don't have anyone to delegate to, get with an accountability partner and walk through with them what you have to do and have them go through the prioritization process with you
  6. Watch how you interact with people - if you are busy/driven, others around you will believe they have to act that way as well, but if they aren't like you will eventually shut down and not want to support you. Keep your "tone" in mind when you ask for support
  7. Take breaks - when your emotions are up, your intelligence is usually down
  8. Schedule time for yourself in INK
  9. Give yourself positive input when the negative voices in your head get too loud
  10. Ask for HELP (see last week's speaker for this one!)
Don't miss next week's call with author Margie Warrell on the 12 acts of courage. Margie Warrell is an internationally recognized executive and life coach,speaker and author. A mother of four young children, Margie is particularly passionate about helping other women pursue their goals with greater success, fulfillment and balance.

With a background in psychology and business (she formerly worked for BP Oil and KPMG), Margie runs leadership and communication programs with major organizations challenging, empowering people to live and lead with greater clarity, confidence and courage.

Originally from Australia, she is the co-author of "101 Ways to Improve Your Life" with Jack Canfield and John Gray, and author of bestselling "Find Your Courage," a finalist in the 2007 USA Best Book Awards. In spring 2009, Margie will release her third book, "Discover Your Inner Strengths," co-authored with Stephen R. Covey and Ken Blanchard.

Staff cutbacks? Doing more with less? Join us for today's call



Nicole will be speaking to us about the Top 10 Time Thieves and how to regain control of your life.

After a professional career in all aspects of business administration, management, sales, marketing and communications and a variety of physical and mental fitness experiences, Nicole Devlin, MBA, ACC and Certified Empowerment Coach, created Verdandi Consulting in 2006. The brainstorm came from the realization that the lives of many, despite being exactly where they wanted to be professionally or materially, lacked motivation and inspiration.

Please make the time (!) to join us today for this timely topic!

Monday, November 3, 2008

Great call on Friday and some practical help for "self-sufficients"

For those of you that haven't yet made one of the EGG calls, I'd like to encourage you to give us a try.

On Friday, Peggy Collins, the author of HELP is Not a Four-Letter Word, was our vignette speaker. Peggy commented at the end of the call "I don't know when I've enjoyed anything more".

She gave us the following test for whether you suffer from self-sufficiency and are heading rapidly on the road to burnout:

  • Can't ask for help
  • Do everything yourself, because no one can do it better
  • Can't delegate
  • Want (and need) to be in control of everything
  • Can help others but can't ask the favor to be returned
  • Define ourselves by our accomplishments
Peggy highlighted that contrary to conventional wisdom, the more self-sufficient you are, the less likely you are to be promoted.

Peggy's book provides some practical ways to get out of this devastating trap, including changing the language we use with our peers and our teams and understanding what we can control and master, versus those that we should let go or let others take action. She noted that "people support what they help create" and that letting others get involved in the solution helps to build the trust that is lacking in a relationship with a self-sufficient executive.

I will be posting the December list of speakers this week and we will announce the date and location of our winter retreat soon. This intimate retreat will have a limited number of slots, so please sign up early.

Chicke Fitzgerald
founder Executive Girlfriend's Group